Who is this Button for?
Be proud and grateful that you can afford to consume a substance more expensive than gold and seldom as pure.
When you are high, use your phone to record your conversations so that all the kind and wise things you say are preserved.
Ask your doctor to prescribe the best sedatives to ease the pain of ‘coming down’.
Happiness lies within one's self, and the way to dig it out is cocaine.
(Aleister Crowley, Diary of a Drug Fiend)
Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money!
In my day, we didn't have the cocaine, so we went out and knocked somebody over the head and took the money. But today, all this cocaine and crack, it doesn't give kids a chance.
Something to consider
Quit snorting or start saving for lawyers' fees, ‘detox’ clinics and expensive bills from Ear, Nose and Throat surgeons.
- shnarf Verb: to snort/insufflate. South African slang in origin. "Bust out that shnarf before going back in." "Michael shnarfed up all we had left." - from the Urban Dictionary 
- Including base-heads, happy dusters, jonesers, sleighriders and Cokie Joes.
- Which in medically supervised dosage can also give you a good night’s sleep. Warning! Addiction to tranqulisers is highly possible, so remind your doctor to get you to sign a contract absolving him/her of all responsibility for this eventuality.
- Nasal reconstruction surgery isn’t cheap and may not be covered by the NHS or your medical insurance – check your policy!