Bald & Virile

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Who is this Button for?

Follicularly-challenged males.

Men walking and talking under a wig or toupee.

Men whose comb-overs make their heads look like barcodes.

Provocative Suggestions

Hairpiece technology is now so advanced that nobody will ever suspect your hair isn't really yours.

Follicular Unit Transplantation is expensive but one of the great medical advances of recent times.[1]

Revel in the knowledge that many women still believe the myth that bald men have higher levels of testosterone.[2]


I don't consider myself bald, I'm just taller than my hair.


My Uncle Harry was a very compassionate man. Because he retained a full head of hair even into his 90s, he always wore a hat so as not to embarrass bald people.

(Arnold Brown)

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.

(Mae West)

Something to consider

Before you worry about being bald or 'do anything' about it, take advice from a few women.[3]



  1. Just to confirm to all my followers I have had a hair transplant. I was going bald at 25 why not. (Wayne Rooney)
  2. Actually male pattern baldness is due to high levels of DHT (dihydrotestosterone) which doesn’t affect libido or sexual prowess, but shhhh......
  3. This is a failsafe approach known by professionals as 'marketing from without in'.